There is a conspiracy afoot to thwart my attempts at acquiring navigation software for my new smartphone.

A year ago, I learned of the upcoming TomTom 7 navigation software. Screenshots and descriptions sounded utterly cool, so I decided to see if I could get my hands on a (legal) copy. TomTom customer service was less than helpful, so I gave up on the issue.

Then my eye was caught by the sublime navigation package iGO 8 by Nav’n’go. 3D landscape! Buildings! Overpasses displayed as such! Saving common itineraries!* PDA contacts automatically added as Points of Interest! The list of coolness went on and on.

Needless to say, I just had to get this software. So I studied the list of compatible devices and calculated when I could reaonably expect Vodafone to give me a new phone for freeish with my subscription renewal. On the list of compatible devices was the HTC Touch Diamond smartphone, a beautifully designed piece of electronics with touch screen, Google Maps, Youtube Mobile and more and more; a true geekfest. It didn’t have a slideout keyboard like it’s big brother the Touch Pro, but that one was not on the compatibilty list, and the whole point was to find myself a device that would run this epitome of navigation coolness, iGO 8.

Finally, The Big Day came. I renewed my subscription, payed a bit extra for the sleek black orgy of technology, the HTC Touch Diamond, and went online that same night to buy myself iGO 8.

In the meantime, the phone had been removed from the compatibility page.

Some fast and furious emailing ensued. It took a few days and considerable effort to elicit a response from Nav’n’go’s support personnel, but I finally got the answers I was asking for.** Yes, he reassured me, the software is absolutely compatible with the phone; that’s why it was on the list. It’s removed from the list now, he explained, because the software can only be “flashed” onto the phone by authorized resellers. But no worry, he confided, because there are not one, not two, but three of these authorized resellers in selected locations across Europe. So if I would simply travel to either Greece, Hungary, or Romania and present my phone to these local resellers, all would be well.***

I decided to forget about iGO and see what the navigation software was that came pre-installed as an evaluation version.

Lo and behold: TomTom 7!

Screw Nav’n’go and their Slavic resellers! I would show them! I would acquire the full version of TomTom 7 (Western and Middle Europe) this same night, and install it, and perhaps even use their 99.9% coverage map of Hungary to drive to the local flasher and say Nyah-nyah-nyah!

So I read the TomTom leaflet that had come with my new phone, and followed the instructions. Navigate to the HTC Europe site, check. Click on the “Kopen” section… Hm, I suppose they mean the “Buy” section. What’s next? Hm, the instructions end. And there is nothing TomTom-like here. Forty different chargers, data cables, and screen protectors, but no sign of the discounted TomTom 7 deal.

Oh, never mind the discount. On the TomTom site, the software isn’t even expensive in the first place. I’ll just buy it directly from them; acquiring navigation software—and Nyah-ing Nav’n’go—has priority over saving a couple of euros. So I clicked Buy, and Checkout, and entered my payment info, and confirmed, and approved the money transfer, and received the confirmation email.

Ny-

Wait a minute. This is not a download link for my software and maps, but for something called TomTom Home, which will download my software for me after I install it. Oh, well. Complicated, but if that’s what it takes… No problems downloading, installation went smoothly, the program launches without errors.

Ny-

What’s this? An error message? No response from the server? Hm, try again. No response again. One more try. Server error. Try again. No response. Let’s see what Google knows about these error messages. Hm, there sure are a lot of hits. Hey, this discussion is about the exact same problem, and the user writes that TomTom has assured him they are aware of the problem and will fix it very soon. When was this?

March?!?

Of 2007?!?

So now I’m the lucky owner of a phone I bought because it’s compatible with software I can only acquire by driving to Romania, and also the lucky owner of TomTom 7 navigation software I can’t install because of a problem TomTom hasn’t been able to fix in over 2 years.

I’m so pissed right now at all navigation software companies that I wish they’d all… they’d all…

GET LOST!!!